Once you have paid for the extras, you wont get your money back unless the housebuilder cancels the sale/reservation.
There is no need to pay for these until just before the work needs to be done so don't.
If the builder's sales (they are on commission for extras!) insist walk away. Housebuilders are struggling to find buyers and they will want your sale, not a cancellation.
Optional extras are always more expensive. Try dealing with the trades or site manager direct.
In some cases there may even be no extra cost such as moving a socket.