New Home Owners And Snagging Forum
General Categories => Jokes => Topic started by: New Home Expert on April 08, 2019, 06:23:19 am
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A beautiful girl says to ex Persimmon CEO Jeff Fairburn she will drop to her knees, do the business and mix him the best Martini he has ever had for afterwards.
He says: " Yes, but what's in it for me?"
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She was an ex Persimmon employee....
So the Martini was made with coke and maple syrup (suitable for consuming so within NHBC guidelines for a drink), in a glass with a hole in the bottom that wasn't picked up on 32 internal inspections by two separate 'manager of the year' award-winning quality control managers.
Her offer to do 'the business' would only occur after he makes 72 phone calls requesting the contracted service, writes to her head office, Local Authority, MP and BBC news and even then in two years time it will be sub contracted to a Eastern European guy with no experience in the trade.
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Persimmon "breach planning regulations" and cut down 260 trees in New Waltham. (https://www.grimsbytelegraph.co.uk/news/local-news/persimmon-chops-down-trees-waltham-2720638?)
They chop down trees, build shoddy homes and go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays they sell leaseholds and have buttered scones for tea!